Getting divorced is generally one of the hardest things you can ever go through. Nobody ever gets married expecting to get divorced. A divorce is often a situation you can’t control and something you aren’t prepared for. It can really mess with your emotions and cause friction in other aspects of your life. It’s vital to your own survival that you find a way to cope, and a Des Moines, Iowa, divorce lawyer can help.
A Divorce Can Be Emotionally Devastating
Everybody’s situation is going to be different when dealing with a divorce. Some people may feel their divorce is a natural progression of their relationship, and it may never really affect them again. Others may take years to get over an emotionally devastating event that is going to impact their future relationships, give them trust issues, and face some hard truths. Enduring the divorce process with your head held high can really make a difference when the time comes.
If your divorce is contested, it is likely going to be a hard road ahead for you. The legal battle of a contested divorce can be overwhelming, confusing, painful, and very personal. They are often considerably expensive, at least when compared to an uncontested divorce, which is usually very straightforward, amicable, and easier to navigate. You might not even need to hire a divorce lawyer for an uncontested divorce.
Healthy Coping Mechanisms for Your Divorce
Sometimes, it doesn’t matter whether a divorce is contested or uncontested. The emotional pain may remain the same for you. The emotional and financial toll a divorce can take may be difficult to fully move past. It’s a significant loss in your life, and sometimes, you have to grieve it like you would a death. You may have to face feelings of betrayal, resentment, insecurity, and even fear before you are able to start picking up the pieces of your life.
While you struggle with the emotional pain of your divorce, you may want to consider a number of important facts about what you are going through. Understanding certain truths can help you move forward and adjust to a new normal. Here are some things you can consider about what you are going through that could help you cope with everything:
- You did not fail. You should never equate divorce with failure. You did not fail as a spouse. While going through a divorce can sometimes feel like you have failed, you should remember that all a divorce really means is you realized you were unhappy and you made the effort to change that. You may want to consider the alternative. Staying in an unhappy marriage and an unhealthy relationship would hurt more in the long run.
- Surround yourself with support. You don’t have to go through this difficult time alone. Take comfort in your loved ones who have stood by you, and embrace support when you can find it. Your divorce lawyer may be able to provide you with additional coping strategies and even support groups that can help you find like-minded individuals going through similar situations. You may also want to consider a therapist.
- You matter. It is important that you let yourself feel everything you are going through. Your emotions count, and you matter. Burying your emotions can have a painful effect on your mental health and your emotional health. If you are feeling grief, let it out. If you are feeling rage, embrace it. You can’t start moving forward until you let yourself experience the full range of emotions you may be dealing with.
FAQs
Q: How Long Does It Take to Get Divorced in Iowa?
A: There is no telling how long it might take to get divorced in Iowa. Everybody’s divorce situation is going to be different, with each case having its own details and factors that will influence the timeline. An uncontested divorce can take considerably less time than a contested one, especially if you work everything out together without any litigation.
Q: Do I Need a Lawyer for My Divorce in Iowa?
A: No, you do not need to hire a lawyer for your divorce in Iowa. If you and your spouse are pursuing an uncontested divorce and have worked everything out amicably, you can simply move forward with the process without the need for a lawyer. If the divorce is contested, you are going to want experienced legal help throughout the entire process, as things can get expensive, confusing, and personal.
Q: Can I Get Divorced if My Spouse Refuses the Papers?
A: Yes, you can still get divorced even if your spouse refuses the papers or simply tries to deny your divorce in any way. If your spouse won’t cooperate in the process, you can file the divorce petition yourself, and the court will proceed with the divorce anyway. If your spouse does not respond when the court sends them the papers, the court will grant the divorce without them.
Q: What Are the Grounds for Divorce in Iowa?
A: Iowa is a no-fault divorce state, which means that you do not need to establish grounds in order to proceed with a divorce. There is no need to assign blame. The only grounds for divorce is a “breakdown of the marriage relationship,” which means that things have gotten so bad in your marriage that the only way forward is to divorce and go your separate ways.
A Good Lawyer Can Help You Figure Things Out
It is important to know that a divorce is going to hurt, especially if you are the spouse who did not want one in the first place. You may not even fully understand why this is happening or what you did wrong if you did anything wrong at all. Regardless, the divorce is going to happen, and it’s important that you take the right steps to protect yourself.
The legal team at Stange Law Firm can provide you with peace of mind that your case is being handled by the right people. We can help you make a parenting plan, work on asset division, and help you identify good coping strategies. Contact us to speak with a team member about your case.
